Amusing and FAKE Virus Warnings

The following was found out on the net.....

We've got a few more "unique" strains of viruses out here in California (don't worry, most require a warm, polluted, overpopulated climate to survive) --

San Andreas Virus:

computer shakes violently for about 20-45 seconds. Occasional shaking occurs randomly for the next few months.

Zuma Beach Virus:

"duuude" gets appended to all text files.

405 Virus:

the hard drive slows to a crawl whenever user is in a hurry. No effect when time is of no consequence.

Smog Alert Virus:

soundcard emits a choking sound and monitor becomes bloodshot.

King Virus:

LAPD come by and beat the crap out of your computer.

Simpson Virus:

your computer deletes a couple of files unexpectedly, dominates all net traffic for 14 months and then announces that it is searching for another virus.

NFL Virus:

all data in LA is uploaded to other cities.

Beach Dwellers Virus:

machine looks great but CPU doesn't work. Not to be confused with the...

Valley Girl Virus:

machine has all the lastest icons but CPU doesn't work. Also, computer wants to go the mall, a LOT.

Rodeo Drive Virus:

Land lines no longer work. A cellular modem is now required. All periphials need to be upgraded to most expensive models available.

Hipster Virus:

all data transmitted via a pager.

Teenage Virus:

machine spends enourmous amounts of time on-line, wants to drive the car. Also note that machine becomes either inactive and quiet OR loud and disagreeable in presence of adults. (Warning - this virus not limited to SoCal!)